…and for that matter, Raspberries to getting up in the early afternoon, or any time you’re not ready for it. But mostly, these raspberries are for that special morning hour which demands us to leave the warm and cozy comfort of our beds to face the world yet another day.
I have to admit, I am not a morning person. I will stay in bed as long as possible–even if it means ignoring the fact that I have needed the bathroom for an hour. Part of me is still exhausted when I’m asked to rouse, and the other part of me wonders what good reason I have to leave the happiness I find in my pillow. Work? Bringing kids to school? An early appointment? All pale in comparison to, well, being snug.
So I lie in wait, knowing that the inevitable will come–rather soon. I will have to get out of bed and face the day. That magic number which my brain dizzily makes up in the misty morning fog, but never truly comprehends, is flashing on my alarm clock. All ambitions of an early start have been pushed off until now. The snooze button (my dear friend) has been abused. My alarm clock, which is usually quite pleasant waking me with bird chirps or sounds of waves, is now beeping angrily like every other alarm clock in America.
I get up. Begrudgingly. Like a kid being forced out of bed and into geometry class. Only now, it is I forcing myself up. I get ready for my day almost spitefully. Then it is a blur of water, hair products, fast breakfast, and lunch kits before I somehow appear at work on time.
Let me clarify that it is not the actual morning which I hate, it is the fact that mornings make me have to stop doing something I am comfortably enjoying–plus wrenching my eyes open when they don’t want to be is just painful. I almost entitled this raspberry: Raspberries for Mornings, but I actually like mornings. On the rare occasion which I am out of the house right at sunrise, I am awed by the beauty and freshness of the morning. I actually enjoy the clean cool air and early morning birds. And I wonder why I don’t get out more often in the morning–like any time when I don’t have to pick up someone at the airport on a 7am flight.
So being up is not the problem, it is getting up. Getting up in the morning is stressful. I’ll stop at that because I feel like I don’t really have to convince you of this one.
The irony is, we know we have to get up at some point. The question I ask myself is: why do we do it later rather than earlier? Does it really hurt less? Since this raspberry is quite a doozie for me, enjoy a chronicle of my daily efforts. I’ll let you know what works and what failed miserably.
Theory #1: Preparing a Nice Morning Will Motivate Me to Have More Desire to Get Up and Face the Day
Perhaps the real stressor here is not when we get up (5 am or 7 am) but how we get up (grumpy, at the last minute, ready to rush). Therefore I will fashion my remedy around this hypothesis.
Stress Source: Feeling exhausted due to the fast pace of it all and leaving no space to appreciate the day.
Stress Relief: 1) A peaceful and fresh awakening, 2) Sufficient home prep time, 3) Self-time before having to be somewhere, and 4) Plenty of transit time
The reason for this theory is that I noticed that when I am on vacation, I get up early. Right when I see the sun. And it is likely because I know fun is ahead, or relaxation, or in the least no obligations. So let’s try this:
1) Peaceful and fresh awakening:
Make sure light comes into the room or if it is dark this time of year, try something like my Hammacher Schlemmer Progression Alarm Clock which simulates sunrise (and progressively adds more sound and scent to your room). Play a sound you enjoy–music or zen sounds. Have the coffee pot brew some fresh coffee for you to smell–in your bedroom! Some people are stimulated just by the sound of the pot bubbling. I’m not a big coffee drinker, but I like the sound and smell!
2) Sufficient home prep time:
Rushing is stressful in itself. Give yourself enough time to enjoy a longer shower, sit down for breakfast and a cup of tea, and
dressing yourself nicely. Physically preparing is mentally preparing. The more thought you put into preparing your day, the calmer you will feel about actually getting into it.
3) Self time:
Plan time for a small (or large) morning ritual which is just for you. Read the newspaper with a cup of chocolate, go to the gym, do deep breathing or tai chi. An enjoyable moment will help give you something to look forward to when your brain is wondering if you really want to get up today.
4) Plenty of transit time:
Plan to be at your destination 15 minutes early. When you get there, take a minute to
appreciate your surroundings, close the door and relax, or even finish listening to the NPR program you were enjoying in your car. Flexibility always decreases stress levels.
Report: Still not getting up. Unfortunately, getting to my nicely prepared morning took more than I had bargained for. Even the promise of good things to come didn’t excite me enough to get me up in time. Let’s try again.
Theory #2: Getting A Good Night’s Sleep Will Help Me Get Up Earlier
Maybe it’s the quantity and quality of my sleep. Am I not sleeping enough or well enough?
Stress Source: A bad night’s sleep.
Stress Relief: Identify the trouble with your sleeping patterns and remedy.
I throw this in because I know right off the top of my head what some of my troubles are: an old mattress with springs poking into my thighs when I lie on my side, and a Snoring Bedmate. Well, the mattress will have to wait until I make some more money, but as for the snorer, I am going to try alternating my breathing patterns so that they do not match the snorer’s. When I breathe while someone is snoring, I feel like I can’t get enough air. So maybe I am not getting the oxygen I need to fully rest.
Report: Still not getting up. I get woken up many times a night by snoring. I know it is affecting my quality of sleep, but what can I do really except take up residence on the couch? I’m going to need another strategy.
Theory #3: Staying Awake after My Natural Waking Time Will Help Me Actually Get Up
I noticed long ago that I have a natural “waking time” which is actually long before I have to get out of bed. It’s the time when my eyes snap open, I am pretty awake…and then I turn over, snuggle in, and go back to sleep. …Just to have to get up an hour or so later with much more difficulty. Maybe if I am able to get up when I first wake up, I will be able to enjoy all of the Theory #1 pleasures while having a less painful wake up.
Stress Source: That painful, eye-searing, lid-dropping sleepiness which makes waking up so…uncomfortable (to say the least).
Stress Relief: Wake up–and Stay Up–when that pain is minimal, like when your body’s clock naturally rouses you.
Step 1: Acknowledge that your body wakes up, without an alarm, all by itself at a certain time.
Step 2: Take a few days to mentally (or physically) note the time this happens. Just look over at the clock and jot it down. We’re not expecting miracles on our first go.
Step 3: Choose a day to get up at that time. If your body wakes you up at 3:30am, go back to sleep. But if it’s 5:30am or 6:00am, let yourself wake up.
Step 4: Here’s the tricky part: Stay Awake. You don’t have to get up right away, but stay awake. Blink a lot, stretch, yawn, talk to yourself or someone else, take repeated deep breaths. The goal is just to stay awake until the time you would normally pluck yourself out of bed.
Step 5: Get Up when you Wake Up.
Report: I got through Step 4 today! Tomorrow, I am going to try Step 4 again with a minor ambition to try Step 5. I learned that whether I go to Step 4 or 5 has a lot to do with my bedmate. If the husband stays in bed, I stay in bed (don’t want to lose out on my time with him). This is why I get irritated if he gets up unceremoniously. I figure, hey buddy, I could have gotten to Step 5 if I hadn’t stayed in bed for you… I guess I’ll have to work on this. 😉